“What do you think you’re doing here?” he snapped into her ear.
“Hudson, please, I just need…”
He slammed the locker door in front of her, almost closing her fingers inside it. “You know the rules. You are not allowed to walk down the same hall as me.”
“I just need to get…” she tried to explain.
He knocked her books out of her hands, and they smacked down to start picking them up.
Hudson started to laugh. “That’s where you belong, you know that. On the ground beneath me.”
He squatted down so that he was close to her so that she could hear him, as he whispered into her ear, “You’re nothing, understand? You’ll always be nothing to me.”
“Yes I’m nothing,” she whispered.
He stood back up and looked down at her with disgust.
“Stay there until I’m gone. I can’t stand the sight of you,” he told her before he turned and walked away.
Amanda sat on the ground next to her locker, rocking herself back and forth, chanting quietly, “I’m nothing.”
Her eyes popped open as she jolted up into a sitting position and took a deep breath, looking around she realized she was in her new dorm room and not back home at her high school.
It was just a dream. She sighed.
“Hey, are you okay?” Amanda heard from her roommate, Tabitha, from across the room.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just a nightmare,” she told her.
“Well, take a deep breath and relax. Today starts the first day of classes. You’ll already be anxious as it is,” she told Amanda before she rolled over and went back to sleep.
Amanda nodded and adjusted the covers that were on her.
The first day of college.
Tabitha was right. She was already going to be filled with anxiety
just from making sure that she found all her classes, then learning what expectations each professor was going to have in each class.
Amanda decided that it was better for her to get up and start the day early. She had a self-mantra that she repeated to herself consistently, “I am somebody. I’m nothing. I’m worth something.” She looked at herself in the mirror as she continued to chant the mantra in her head. She could no longer see the skinny twig that she was all throughout high school. Puberty finally graced her with its presence. She had more of a figure now, and just before school started, she decided to cut her long hair which was stringy and thin to her shoulders to help it look thick and healthy. She was happy with her transformation. Just one more way to say goodbye to her old self and hello to the new her. This Amanda wasn’t going to let others determine her worth. No longer was she going to let anyone bully her the way Hudson did? She shook his name out of her head. No, she was no longer the that shy, awkward girl that let everyone walk all over her. No longer would she be the butt of their jokes. She was going to meet new people and have new experiences. Especially first experiences. She smiled to herself in the mirror before grabbing her shower caddy and making her way down to the bathrooms.
Amanda walked back into her dorm room to find her roommate Tabitha still sleeping in her bed.
Amanda shook her head but smiled. She had already learned her lesson from yesterday when she tried to wake Tabitha up early to go out to breakfast and see the campus. The girl loved to sleep and hated to be disturbed.
She looked at herself one more time in the full-length mirror before heading out to get some breakfast and a coffee. Just a sip from Café was a quaint little coffee shop that sat on the corner just before you turned onto the campus. Amanda walked into the Café and found herself in a pretty long line. She looked at her phone to check the time and figured she had enough time to wait. After a minute or two, she noticed the line moved pretty quickly.
“Hi, can I get a large mocha latte and a blueberry muffin, please?” Amanda asked.
The woman looked at her for a moment while she entered her order into the register.
“Have you been here before? I swear you look familiar,” the woman asked.
Amanda shook her head. “No, actually it’s my first time here. I’m starting at the college; it’s my first day,” she said as she slightly blushed.
“What’s your name, sugar?”
“Amanda.”
Once the order was completed, the woman smiled and said, “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Amanda. I hope I’ll see you in here again.”
“Thank you. I’m sure you will.”
Amanda moved out of the way and went to wait for her order. When she picked up her order, she headed for the door. Once outside, she got the weirdest chill that went down her body. She looked around but saw nothing. She continued to make her way onto the campus. As she was walking, she accidentally ran into what felt like a wall and jumped back so that her coffee wouldn’t spill all over her.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t see you there,” she heard a thick rich accent say to her.
She looked up to see a very handsome tall guy looking down at her and smiling. He had dirty blonde hair that he had tied back
and the deepest blue eyes she had ever seen. She laughed to herself a little. Dang, he was hot.
“It’s my fault. I must’ve not been looking where I was going,” she said to him with a slight smile.
“Maybe we’ll run into each other again sometime,” he said before turning and continuing the way he was going.
“Mm-hmm” was all she could get out as she watched him walk away.
Wow, who was that? She thought to herself.
She turned and started to head to her first class of the day. She was excited to be in this class since she heard that Professor Warren was not only a great teacher of English but was also a looker. When she entered the class and saw a lot of girls, she guessed the rumors were right.
She walked over to a section of the classroom that was vacant and sat down, getting herself organized and ready for the class. Her body shivered again when she felt someone standing next to her, and the hairs on the back of her neck started to rise.
“Well, if it isn’t my lucky day,” she heard the husky voice say to her.
She knew that voice. It was the voice that sent chills down her spine and made her body tingle with anxiety. She closed her eyes, trying to calm herself down, before looking up into the eyes of her high school bully, Hudson Harlow.